LOL, I Love Conflict

I want to talk about the lolapalooza that is the average Modern Satinist attack against "Niners " in general. Keeps happening lately. ;)

The insult thrown out the most is, "I am an Individual and bow and follow nobody. " This is always followed by laughable insults of a personal nature, accusations of being a fan girl or boy, or hanging off someone's nuts.

Now, the Individuality argument always fails because these people that throw out the Individuality, I am a wolf among the herd bullshit, always tow "the herd's " line. They are against violence. They are against Racism, Anarchism, Nazism and a host of things that the largest collective in the World subscribes to, the very essence of the Magian made manifest in an individual's psyche.

I don't know a single individual, regardless of their leanings, that would say "Yep, I am a sheep, following a herd." Every one of those sheep, feel they are making their own choices. Every one of those sheep feel they are individualist.

See, part of the trick the system offers is the Perception of Choice. Basically, all of are told, "Choose whatever you want to be. There's nobody controlling you. " It's a lie. I have kids and I let them choose what to eat on occasion. I give them three or four choices and let them pick from them. Last night, my son got me on this one. He said, "My choice?" I said yes. He said, "I want chocolate cake for dinner. " I said, "That's not a choice available. "

That's the essence of what the system does. It lays out a few options and let's you choose from them, while hiding the existence of Chocolate Cake.

So, you have a whole group of people that claim to be Satanists, while towing the party line. Saying things like, "I don't oppose the system, I want to manipulate it and than become it." Um, yeah that's another lie the system tells. Do this set of things and you'll "Master the System." No, you'll be a more willing slave.

I read something about the Civil War, that said House Niggers were less likely to run from their Masters. There was an account of a maid that even after the War, being set free and all that, she refused to leave the family that owned her. Worked for them until she died.

That's who you become if you decide to go that route. You become the type who feels superior to other slaves and free, but you're more bound than a "lesser " slave is. That's all most Satinists are. People who have decided they can or will dominate the System. When the reality is, they never ask for chocolate cake, they don't even know it exists.

I want cake, most "Niners " I know want cake. That's the thing, most of the things that get the, "Oh My God, the ONA is Evil RUN!!!", reaction are the real Devils of today. Even the idea of a Kollective or collaboration hits that note of fear with Satinists.

Why? They know, way deep down they are sheep. They know they are chained and enslaved, I believe everybody does deep down. The thing that always struck me about the movie The Matrix, was how you never notice how fake the simulated world  looks, until Neo goes back in. The second (and every other time)  time I watched The Matrix, I noticed all kinds of fakeness, from the very start of the movie.

So, they know, it whispers in the back of their minds "I am a willing slave. " This is why they fight so hard against anything that truly opposes society and the status quo, that's why the thought of being part of a collective scares them.  Anything truly heretical is "to far."

It's my biggest beef with Modern Satanism. When I decided to go online, I expected to get offended, I expected to be manipulated, I expected to get used, talked shit about when I wasn't around, etc. I did not expect Satanists to be politically correct. I did not think Satanists would run screaming from ideas that are truly radical, heretical, gross and profane.

Isn't that why the label is Satanism and not called Super Serial Individualism? Because Satan  represents what people fear, what they hate and despise. So, the individuals taking that label on become feared, hated and despised.

I can always tell a real Satanist from a Satinist in a fundamental way. A "true" Satanists sets off my fight or fly instinct instantly. They make me feel a touch of fear as soon as I read what they wrote or see them face to face. I never lose that entirely, I am always a touch scared, while being intrigued and interested at the same time. It's instinctual.

The funniest part of all, is ONA uses these heretical forms people want to claim to be Satanists run from, in order to create Individuals. Not the Magian bullshit version, but people who have truly made their own choices. They have crossed their mental lines, transgressed society's norms and are in an active process of learning who they really are, freeing themselves of Causal abstractions, while choosing their own. The ONA is breeding individuals who are true Individuals, who understand that collaboration is critical. Everyone seeks their own kind out, socialization is a fundamental human need. Collaboration is necessary for the System, and the Enemy to be toppled once and for all.

So keep misunderstanding, keep talking shit. You just show your level of ignorance, your lack of understanding of fundamentals of human nature.

FS3.0

Learning Through Adversity

Any knowledge that is not rooted in experience is suspect. One sentence that boils the essence of a Praxis to it's most basic wording.

The issue with most of humanity is putting stock in their own opinions and what one thinks about any subject. There is even a delightful selection of labels to choose from, that let people know how you think about things. Most are bound to these rather Democrat, Republican, Christian or Satanist. A label based on thought, rather than action.

But what do most do? What is their true knowledge? Do these labels for thinking in a Super Serial manner indicate who that individual is?

As I interact with others, I see most of these terms of identification are meaningless to most. Is there a difference between a Democrat and a Republican? Not really. What about a Christian and a Satanist? Not for most. I despise it.

I have never really cared what "affiliation " one claims as long as they are living it, applying the philosophical constructs they espouse, in their daily lives. I can't stand a lying, cheating, selfish Christian, the same as I can't stand Satanists who still espouse morality, living within the law and the upholding of society's values over the individual and self sovereignty.

It annoys me because anything I truly believe I live. My life has been complicated, difficult, full of just as much success as failure, mind twisting at it's most difficult, full of heartbreak, strife, and adversity, but I have survived all of it. Grown stronger due to the hardship.

The funny thing about learning through real adversity, is you don't become "nice " or "good." You become harder, more willing to do whatever it takes to survive, to thrive, to do better. You lose the comfort of depending on others, rather society or people, in favor of you and your own judgment.

One year ago, I joined SIN. So I could interact with Satanists. I learn better by doing and interacting, not reading. Things I read have to relate to my life, or I don't really "get it." If I can find a mental bridge between the idea being presented and my own life, it clicks pretty quickly.

Finding and exploring Satanism has been the single most liberating experience of my life. I lacked the language to explain my own personal philosophical thoughts. Satanism has always felt more like RE-membering,  than learning something knew. I said on the Ooze once, "I feel like I am remembering what I always knew. " That still rings true.

At the end of the day, rhetoric is just rhetoric, opinions are just opinions, ideas are just ideas, and it's mostly meaningless bullshit.  Knowledge is a personal thing, based on experience, not what others know or think. Let your Satanism bleed out, color and affect every aspect of your life. I firmly believe there is no aspect of life that is free from being infected. No part of my life where I don't apply that Praxis, nothing that isn't altered by my own knowledge and experience.

FS3.0

Influence

Everyone in the world thinks they are unaffected, that they are free mentally, and individuals. The truth is everyone is influenced, everyone is inspired, affected and shaped by others, by the life they live.

I used to buy the Satanists are born not made idea. I used to believe one could become completely free of "environmental " memetics . I don't anymore. Would I be who I am right now, if I had made different choices? If I had lived a different life? No, so how can I say while being intellectually honest that I was born a Satanist? No,  I can say beyond a shadow of a doubt that my life experiences made me who I am. I can honestly say I don't really give a fuck one way or another either. I'm over it. 

I'm "over" a lot at this point. I have influences, there are people who have deeply affected my view on the World. Rather through what they said or a lesson interaction with them imparted. That's how memetics are spread. Someone says something, writes something, or you experience something and bam! it hits you deeply, in an intuitive, almost indescribable manner. It gives words to a previously wordless conclusion.

Resonance is not manipulation. It's more emotional than logical. Even if the writer intends to manipulate (which really just means they "get" memetics and have focused theirs) . The writer has no control of how a work has been interpreted. Rarely if ever do two individuals get the same thing out of a work. Some are influenced and inspired, some think it's crap.

Let me give you an example, I love Crowley. I was a Thelemite for awhile (I liked Babalon) . However, I never dug his Magickal writings much. I loved his fiction and his autobiography. Moonchild is still a favorite of mine.  It hit me in that emotional place, I found the World created beautiful.

The memetics he inserted (and you can bet your ass there is. Moonchild is Thelma 101 in so many ways) , explained Thelema better than all his Magickal shit put together, for me personally. Most Thelemites would say it was The Book of Law.

The point is nobody is memetically resistant. There is a constant bombardment being thrown at you. You can't become "free" of these influences. They're everywhere. It's a matter of finding a way to fight back, establish a worldview that makes you more skeptical, less programmable.

The other part, for me at least is choice. I choose what memetics I am exposed to. I avoid television, radio, mainstream news, etc as much as possible. I avoid institutions I disagree with, don't shop at stores whose business practices I abhor, and avoid memetics I know I don't want to have to fight off. This enables me to choose my battles, and have more energy when I do fight.

It's one of the reasons I am not online as much. I would prefer to do my battling in real life at the moment. Plus, most threads consistent of two people arguing over their opinions. Rarely is the end result one or the other changing their mind. Those were the back and forths I enjoyed having, when someone actually changed their mind.

I have my own goals and reasons that I write. I do most things with a purpose now, have been for awhile.The main one being the fact that very few women do participate and I want to see more women participating. Why? I am a selfish bitch and want to read what they write. I want to read about how the ONA affects other women and their lives. So I do it myself in order to influence through example.

So,  I have started targeting women specifically. I will go comment on their shit and see how they react. Three have really surprised me as of late, they are brilliant in their own ways.

Anyway, this blog is done. I know it's rambling and goes off topic but I don't care. Now that I don't link my blogs up to other sites I feel free.

FS3.0

For Mr. B or Revolutionary Rhetoric

Second response to Mr.B, focusing on him mentioning the ONA3.0 phenomenon at SIN. As always this is simply my take on things, others in the Kollective may disagree.

Revolutionary Rhetoric

Satan as an archetype (or in my case Master Idea, read my blog My Thoughts on Satan for more) has some very specific concepts involved. Evil. Opposition. Adversary. Accuser. Everyone knows what those are. Now, one that is being brought to light at places like SIN is Rebellion.

What is God as a Master Idea, in a secular society? The Government, the State. Law and Order. So.... what do the Adversaries of this God thang do at this point? Oppose the Religious God, one aspect of that Master Idea that has become an useless, dried husk? NO!! They continue to oppose God, the High God of this secular society, they begin to oppose, to rail against Society itself, and the. Government. It's laws, it's institutions, it's new status quo memes. Rather they are political correctness, Egalitarian values, the consumer culture each of us comes into contact with. These are the things that need to be burned down now, these are the sacred cows that need to be butchered.

You also have to look at the state of the economy, the populous, etc. Lots of people are pissed at how things are now. Anonymous and the Occupied Movement one example. The rise in membership in Extremist organization is on the rise. In the US, the economy sucks, we just got out of a housing crisis. Everyone is scared that it's going to come crashing down, most are just trying to ignore the shit going on. But the winds of destruction are in the air, and some people want to make it happen faster. This idea of Revolution, is in more than the Satanic community, it's everywhere.

Now, for me personally, my Praxis has a few base elements that have never changed. Burning off memes to get to my "core self " is a fundamental. Some memes can be read out, some a little critical thinking pulls out, some can be debated out. However, the most insidious memes, the ones with roots so deep, you think they are innate personality characteristics, have to be "done out ". In order to rid yourself of those requires more effort than most Satanists take.

So, some of the rhetoric 3.0 uses revolves around, making people ask themselves do they really oppose God in this society, by upholding it's laws, it's values? How are you transgressing to burn off memes?

For me personally, I just want to see the shit burn. I am utterly disgusted with most of humanity and just how apathetic they are. When I go in public places I feel like I am surrounded by a sea of zombies (wouldn't be so bad if this train of thought didn't give me nightmares) . I.want out. I am willing to do anything to achieve that goal of slipping off the map, so I can be more free than most.

FS3.0

For Mr.B or Forms, Essence, Etc

Reading around this morning I found somebody critiquing ONA3.0 and the ones who use SIN specifically. He referred to it as the ONA3.0 phenomenon. As with all things, I simply speak for myself and am offering my own perspective here. Others in the Kollective may disagree.
Form vs Essence

I understand the concept of form vs essence through my children. Each of them has the same DNA, the same genetic code but they are different. Different personalities, different looks, different intererests. They are being raised in the same way, by the same parents. However, are they the same? No, not at all. Those personality differences, their personality quirks, make them who they are.

Using children as an analogy, essence is the DNA they each have, form is their individual personalities, and their parenting and parents would be the ONA and the five core principles. This isn't hard to get, or difficult to understand.
The most important thing to remember is that language is an abstraction, it's the base of one's worldview. I can't tell you what essence is being described. You have to live it, manifest that acausal presence in your own life.

That essence is one that Satanism simply attempts to describe. Satanism is simply one form out there. Other forms work just as well, as long as they capture that essence.

FS3.0
P.S. This is only part one of a two part response.

Belonging...

Everyone wants to find others like them, people that feel like family. So, the hole in your heart from being unusual or different is filled, to find the missing piece of you. It's why we develop interpersonal relationships. It's why children are borne, friends are made. An inner pain that all humans have.

Much like any pain, that loneliness, that need to belong is the catalyst for growth, the reason any individual engages others. It's the form of pain that has produced all communities.,societies, and families. In order to stop feeling driftless, hopeless and lonely.

The cost of trying to squash that pain is influence. Others are let in to dull that pain, leading to emotional exposure, the opportunity exists to get hurt. You can be ousted by your group, disrespected by someone you are emotionally attached to. You're lover can decide you are unworthy. You're family may decide your lifestyle is abhorrent and unacceptable. Then what?

Answer :pain. Everyone can wax philosophical until the cows come home about "not giving a damn" but when it's your people on some level you DO care. You wonder what you could have done differently. You wonder if maybe they are right.

When I started practicing Satanism, I went all in.. I vowed that I wouldn't go halfway and be done with it. I vowed it would be the focus of my life and that I would live in accordance with it's principles. To never plateau or decide I am some know it all, pretentious asshat.

Mission accomplished so far. However, I am losing relationships left and right. My father won't speak to me because I am not LaVeyan and he thinks the ONA is to extreme. My mother and sister I cut out voluntarily but it hurts today and I can't give in, I can't call worthless dross people. My in laws think I am crazy for doing the things I've done recently. I have lost friends, quite a few for refusing to do what they want me to.

Should I feel pride for sticking to my path? Should I rail and rage against the injustice these people have done to me? Should I pretend it doesn't matter to me?

I don't have the emotional energy to pull it off. At this moment it just hurts. Good thing I embrace pain, it's when I know I'm alive and that I am going to learn. Anyway, fuck it. Happy Thanksgiving.

FS3.0