Snakes In The Grass

All social interaction is a give and a take. A relationship is almost always based on things that once emotion is taken away are just transactions.

This very quickly gets into manipulation of others. The attempt by you to gain from someone else without giving much. You can see this social manipulation everywhere you go. When you deal with Satanists its discussed with a viewpoint that lacks the moral repugnance you will see from other groups. People boast and brag about the manipulative skills or how they have done this or that to someone else. Like it's somehow different than what is done subconsciously by all humans on a daily basis.

Let's put that shoe on the other foot for a minute. It's always perfectly fine when you are on top and the one manipulating the shit outta someone. It sucks when it's done to you. It will just piss you off that it happened to you.

And everyone has had it happen to them. Everyone gets screwed over by someone else sometime. Your boss asks you to do a little extra work in order to get promoted but the promotion never comes. You fuck somebody and they don't call you back. You realize you are buying a whole lot of dinner and drinks for your friend but they don't reciprocate. Whatever, you get fucked over like you bent over and begged for it.

One night I went to a bar and started talking to this really cute guy. The first thing I said to him was, "Hi, do you have a condom?" Yes, I am this kind of slut when I am in excruciating mental pain, it's a side effect. I refused to let him buy me any drinks. I went to his car fucked him and said to him, "Thanks." and got out of his car. He kept saying where are you going?, what are you doing?, etc. I felt sorry for him and gave him my phone number.

This motherfucker blew my phone up for about a week. I know on the surface it looks like something any dude would want. However, because I was the one manipulating him into a one night stand he was hurt and pissed over the whole thing. One of his messages he left was something to the effect of he has one night stands all the time but NO woman just fucks him and doesn't call him back.

It happens to me all the time as well. Someone manipulates me and succeeds I feel like a moron. I am hurt, I am pissed off, I feel betrayed, used. Now considering that I can intellectually figure out that this is what most social interaction is based on I shouldn't feel that way. Considering I discuss this concept quite frequently with a moral detachment why do I suddenly feel moral repugnance when it happens to me?

'Do unto others as they do unto you' is all fine and good until someone does to me what I do to others. Like any monkey behavior I see in myself it's hypocritical as fuck. It's yet another example of how I intellectualize something without accounting for the emotional component.

I was standing in line at a coffee place and realized I was totally flirting with some guy I had no intention of having anything to do with. He was cute and I hate paying for my own coffee. I caught myself flipping my hair mid -standing in line- conversation with him. I actually thought, 'the fuck are you doing Jeanette' when he said, 'What kind of coffee do you want?'

I also watch other people for manipulative behavior and examine past interactions for any hint of manipulation in them. I think things like, 'did he actually think I was intelligent or was it an excuse to get into my pants.' 'is she using me?' 'When that happened five years ago was he intending to fuck me over?'

Just a loop that is paranoid as fuck but utterly realistic. People, whether they realize it or not, are snakes in the grass. Since I know that, I don't want to get bitten.

Rant A Little, Rant A Lot

In life and modern society there is a gross idea that a woman is responsible for a violent crime if she behaves or dresses in a certain manner. The worst part is that this idea is most commonly perpetuated by women about other women. I see posts like this all the time: Don't tell people you're a naughty girl and not expect retaliation. Don't walk around with your tits hanging out or in a short skirt and not expect to get raped??

What the fuck is wrong with you people? Is this the motherfucking dark ages? Are you a member of the Taliban?? This mentality is what keeps women in the Middle East wearing fucking beekeeper outfits as everyday wear. This is remnants of the mentality that got women burned at the stake for not fitting in and conforming to the standard of the day. This is the reason people were stoned.

It disgusts me for a lot of reasons. It paints men as some kind of monster that doesn't have the self control to realize that just because a woman is displaying her goods, doesn't mean they're for sale. It paints men as the type of creature that just bangs women over the head and has their way with them because they can't control their urges.

It puts an odd level of responsibility on a woman's shoulders. I'm supposed to what, figure out the line that won't make men lose control and only wear things in that clothing range. I'm supposed to, after being physically assaulted sit around and try to figure out if I did something to turn that guy on?

I'm drawing my line in the sand and calling bullshit on ALL OF THIS.

1. Rape is not about sexual desire in 'traditional'terms. Rape is a form of violence, it just happens to be a sexual assault as opposed to physical assault. It's not that a woman looked so good a guy was completely overwhelmed by sexual desire and his brain turned off. Rape is about dominance, d00d's wires are crossed and violence turns them on. In my self defense class I learned several techniques to prevent physical assault (rape is a physical assault). One was to not protect the image of a victim. Has nothing to do with what you wear, it has to do with body language, look straight ahead, shoulders back, project an aura of confidence, not victimization. The other one was if someone does grab you and starts raping you don't cry, don't struggle, don't beg. Just lay there. A good number of times they will lose arousal as a result of this.

2. I have been completely naked in front of lots of men for a living. Most treat you with an odd kind of reverence when you are half dressed or undressed. Men don't lose all of their faculties at the sight of a woman nude. They can still THINK. Hell, they can discuss the stock market with you or their job with no problem.

3. American women are weird. They think that projecting an overly sexual image is an indication of being sexually mature. Y'all know what I'm talking about. The woman who tells you how much she likes to give head. The woman who tells you about all the threesomes she's had. The woman who calls herself shit like dirty girl. This kind of sexuality is indicative of being sexually immature and not really knowing what she wants. It's the equivalent of a little girl in her mommy's high heels wearing red lipstick. I personally feel Western sexuality is so in your face because most people are still uncomfortable with their sexuality.

4. I frequently use sexual manipulation to gain in life. I make no apologies for this, it's like breathing for me, sometimes I am not aware I am doing it. One thing I have learned in life is that Women aren't as physically strong as men, one of the things women have in their toolbox that works to gain in life is sexual manipulation. The mentality I am talking about in this blog, disempowers women.

5. I wear clothes that could be considered slutty because they make me feel good about myself. If I am wearing a short skirt and low cut shirt, I have more confidence than if I am laying around in sweat pants (which I have on at this moment). I hate wearing jeans, always have. So I wear clothing that qualifies as someone who 'deserves it' in the eyes of some women. Men aren't chasing me down the street to rape me on a continuous basis. Personal experience bitches.

6. Get a weapon and wear it in a visible manner. For fucks sake people, the best form of protection from physical assault is being able and ready to defend yourself. Remember the confidence I talked about earlier?? Yeah, exactly.

7. Common fucking sense. Don't walk down the street in a bad neighborhood at night dressed to provoke a man's sexual desires. If you got to go in an area like that at night, dress like an undercover cop. Ponytail, mirrored sunglasses, jeans, blazer, visible side arm.

Now I know some people are going to claim personal responsibility on this one and I agree. I have not put all responsibility on men in this blog, the opposite is actually the case. A woman is responsible for being capable of protecting herself. This rarely has to do with what you wear. This has to do with your ability to knock someone the fuck out. Project the aura of Warrior not victim.

/End rant

Demons Don't Dream...

These inner demons kick at you, punch you, fight you, berate you, insult you, they tear you down from the inside out. That voice that says you aren't good enough, those things in your life saying you haven't done enough, are designed to stop you, to make you quit. To make you scream in frustration at the fact that no matter how hard you try you don't control anything but yourself.

Worthless, vapid, stupid, just a woman, a tool to be used to advance your own agenda. That's all I am to everyone else most of the time. And I know it. I know it's why this person and that person has done the things they have done to me, why they have said the things they have to me, or about me when they thought I wouldn't hear, that it wouldn't get back to me.

How do I know this? Because I treat you the same exact way. I just cover it up and justify it by saying I am not as bad as they are. That I am less manipulative, that I don't view people as a stereotype. It's bullshit, the reason I hate you is the reason I hate myself. Because I am human and the dark side of humanity, the demon within all of us makes me a disgusting, cruel creature, capable of atrocities beyond the scope that the human mind can process.

Lying, cheating, stealing, manipulating, covering it up in justifications that make myself a good person, the kind of person someone else would actually want to be around. But, I'm not and neither are you.

Do you fear that side of yourself? You fucking should. Do you fear that side of me or others you encounter? You should.

Get fucking paranoid, look around you and realize the people you care about the most are probably using you for their own gain. Get fucking proud and refuse to be used by others any longer. Get fucking real, quit crying in the corner and say to yourself, I am going to use them just as well as they use me. Quit giving a damn about what others think. Carve your own motherfucking path and to Hell with what your parents say, people you respect say, your friends say, your partner says, your conscience screams. They are all trying to stop you from getting real. They are all trying to stop you from living your own truth. YOU are stopping you at this very moment from facing what true freedom is and can be.

Demons don't dream, they don't sit around and talk about what they are going to do. Demons do.

Superiority Complex

How do you judge your superiority? Is it based on other people or being better than you were previously?

I see the former a shitload on the internet. People who say well I am better, I am superior, I am the highest embodiment of life, because I am better than you. I find this to be an ultimately self defeating mindset to operate under.

Why? Some other motherfucker out there is stronger, bigger, faster and smarter than you. Fact. You are not the biggest, baddest and strongest their is in the entire World. None of us are.

I tend to see the concept of Might is Right or Will To Power in a more compartmentalized fashion. What I mean is that for each area of life, what is stronger triumphs over what is weaker. So the better looking woman wins the looks contest, while the stronger man wins the strength contest. You get the idea and none of us are going to post all tens across the board.

So you can see yourself as Superior because you are better than a bunch of other idiots out there. You can, once again, derive your sense of self from others, even if it's from a Superiority stance.

Or you can turn that inward, invert this idea and use it to shape yourself, to evolve yourself somehow. Are you Superior to the old you, the you that existed a week ago, a month ago or a year ago? Are the results of what you engage in tangible? Can you see the effects of the physical exertion? Do you think in a different way, have you learned something more about yourself from an experience you have had?

If not, you are the same old monkey you have always been. You aren't Superior, you're just another person deriving their sense of worth from others while mouthing off.

I KNOW I am Superior to the old me. Hell, I am Superior to the me that logged on to the interwebz two years ago. I find the old me (from two years ago) to be a high maintenance, whiny, ass kissing, pseudo intellectual little bitch.

I have said it before, when I am looking at others, I really only look for one thing, an evolution of thought to be occurring. This is tangible, even via the interwebz. You can read someone else's opinions change, you can see the results of an Adversarial Praxis in play, even if it is just via what they write.

That's what I tend to respect, those people where I see that evolution. Those are the people that have always made my respect list. If you make my shit kicking list, it is for one reason: I don't see it in you. You are at the same place, spouting the same shit you did the moment I met you.

Either do the work or GTFO. Make yourself Superior to the old you, period. Being Superior to the average jackass is easy. Doing the work to change yourself, to understand who you really are, breaking the chains you have on your psyche is way more fucking difficult.

FS

12 Ways To Be A FemaleSatan

1. Always get pissy when you or other women get treated like the little woman in a subculture dominated by Mysogynists.

2. Cuss like a sailor but fail to understand why there are accusations you have no class.

3. Have no issue with being told you're a cunt, bitch, whore or slut but get pissed you got called doll.

4. Flirt with all the men in the Satanic subculture but get pissed someone called you a fangirl.

5. Show your breasts in chat but then want to be viewed as an intellectual.

6. Call out other women for their sexy  pictures, while the pics on your profile were some of the sluttiest at SIN.

7. Tell everyone you are going to birth the Antichrist with Zach Black the owner and than answer whut? to a pm asking you how long you've been fucking him.

8. Be as argumentative as possible but then say you hate e-drama.

9. Write long, wordsoupy, cliched  blogs about Satanism.

10. Call yourself the Britney Spears of Satanism.

11. Call out people for being stalkerish losers just looking for attention (whether positive or negative)  then stalk them  yourself all  over SIN giving them plenty of that attention. (Credit :Meq)

12. Become an Ooze cohost simply for uploading pictures of your ass for Beast and having a vagina.